It's Not You, It's Me...Really

Today I was a grown-up. I have been waffling about what to do with one of my volunteer roles. I am a board member on the Central Bucks YMCA. I love the Y and all that it stands for; especially the community focus. When my family first moved to Bucks County, the Y was the first place that I felt a sense of belonging. I have been on the board...a great board...for three years. However, my life is just not fitting with board member responsibilities. I have known this for a few months and actually tried to resign two other times. I am a sucker for pleasing people, so when my resignation was challenged...I ended up walking away from my need to leave the board.

Board meetings are weekday evenings around 7pm. Hmmm, what is happening at that time? Well, K2 and K3 are probably running wild while I pray for the end of the day. Committee meetings have been at 7am or 4pm. Yes, prime mommy time. School drop off in the morning and after school pick-up which is followed by homework. Not a good "fit".

I tried to make it work and they tried to make it work. In fact, the leader of the board was over accommodating by providing me with the option of not needing to attend board meetings and other activities. Sounds good but not for me. I am so Type A, that I could not tolerate not doing everything that my role is suppose to do...including attending 7am meetings despite the fact that I have three little kids who can't even make their own cereal. Another thing that I have realized is that I need more brain space. Sounds crazy, I know. What I mean is, I need more free room in my mind and in my thoughts so I can think, make decisions and simply be more calm. I need that space in my brain back, so the Y had to go.

I was a grown-up today. I did what was hard and what I was not comfortable doing. I went with what gut (which I call God in disguise) instead of what was the comfortable thing to do. I was a grown-up today...what about you? What grown-up decisions have you made lately?